apples to apples

i continue to be amazed by Apple products - i mean i love the fact that i've converted to using only Apple products. i've been on the quest to make this uber professional recording software work. so it was out with the old and in with the new recording interface. this one is more sexy anyway. the new macbooks are only USB hence my struggle with making a Firewire interface compatible with a USB only notebook. whew, that was nerdy.

i wreak of aloe vera. we went camping again this past weekend and had a blast. the second day of sun i neglected to apply a sufficient amount of skin protectant. alas i'm sun kissed and semi sore yet beautifully tan. i spent a lot of the weekend skating back and forth around the campground. gosh, it was fun. i felt like a kid again. that feeling should never go away. the feeling of being a kid again. it's something about that campground that makes me digress to when i was growing up and that entire state park was my playground. it's kinda special to me. i mean, hey, it was where i was conceived. ew.

so last week was the band's CD gig at the Henrico Theater - boy it was fun. i haven't played a rock show that like in a long time but it also gave me some perspective on the direction in which i'd like to take my career. unfortunately i've felt limited for many years and let's just say i'm ready to no longer limit myself. we'll see where it goes. i mean it's hardly 'gone' anywhere for the past few years so it could only get better, right?

i just can't believe the life i used to lead and how much i tricked myself into thinking i was 'happy' when really it was hurting me and those around me. i wake up everyday thankful - that's never happened. i've always searched for more and more trying to achieve something better. feeling lost and complacent but going through the motions of a life that i thought i was 'supposed' to lead never taking a moment to identify what kind of person it was turning me into. my heart literally aches for those that i see living a life like that. you want to grab them by the shoulders, shake them incessantly and yell "what the hell are you doing?!?!" a yearning to express how fast life passes you by and every moment is a moment wasted while you sit on your lazy ass doing nothing about improving your standard of life. i'm selfish. but selfish to a degree in which i threw all of my inhibitions out the window, stuck my middle finger up to our societal expectations, defied the norm and broke free from a life that was dragging me down. i've let too many things drag me down. i used to care way about the material things in life way too much. i've changed my perspective and it feels damn good.

my apologies, i didn't mean to rant - i just kind of took a brain shit for a moment.

i'm getting sleepy and someone is waiting for me...